It was the single most awkward phone conversation I’ve ever had in my life. Oh yes…far more awkward than telling my boyfriend (at the time) who was stationed in Alabama whilst I lived in Nebraska that if he was planning on making any big purchases in the near future (i.e. an engagement ring) that now was probably not the time (read: I don’t want to marry you).
A man I had met, through an organization I’m affiliated with, earlier this summer and met out twice for happy hour drinks quite literally made me speechless and that NEVER happens to me!
Allow me to set the scene. He is significantly older than me.
Well…not Michael Douglas/Catherine Zeta-Jones significant …but when I was holding hands and “couple skating” with my 5th grade boyfriend at Star Skate…he was the college dude working there and holding the limbo rod for all us kiddies. Infer from that what you will.
So after a couple of meetings with said organization, he asked me out for drinks. No big deal. We did that twice and then chatted about doing dinner soon. We exchanged a few text messages and a couple of emails and that was it. Between a trip to Seattle and the Wall Street crisis, the “dinner ball” got dropped.
“No biggie” thought I. I’m certainly not invested in anything here and I’m not even (to quote my earlier “Dating as a business” blogs) in the market for any right now. But I’m never one to turn down some half way decent conversation over cocktails.
So you can imagine my shock when I had the phone conversation recounted below.
Him - "Hey True. Wow you really jetted out of that meeting fast today. I wanted
to visit with you and then I looked up and you were gone."
Me - "Oh yeah. Sorry. I'm up to my eyeballs in budget stuff this week."
Him - "Well hey. I wanted to visit with you in person about this. I know a few weeks
ago we got together for drinks and then visited about going out to dinner and
then I kind of dropped the ball and I didn't want you to think that I'm a big
asshole. But, I just wanted you to know that right around the time I met
you I met someone else and I am just not the sort of guy who can do the whole
dating multiple people at once thing, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...I think
you’re really great and I really like you, blah, blah, blah…"
Me – “Uhhh…okay. Thanks?” (Really??? What do you say in this
situation?)
Then after some awkward conversation about the upcoming golf tournament and the state of our nations finances he was like…”Oh yeah. Happy hour will be starting for me early today about 3pm. So if you want to join me later give me a call. Or maybe we could get together tomorrow at the game. Where do you usually tailgate???”
I’m sorry??? What the heck is that?? Am I a consolation prize? I wanted to say…”Did you or did you NOT just break-up with me? And now you want me to meet you out for drinks?” I began to wonder if that was just the guy way of saying…”I think we should just be friends”.
My friend Kim said…”Okay… He’s a fruit. And not one of those sweet delicious ones. One of those bitter ones. Maybe even one of those star fruit. You know, you think it’s gonna be good. It looks pretty good. And smells kind of good. But then you take a bite and, ugh…not quite what you think. Damn, wrong time of year for that. Go pick some apples.”
Always a fan of a good metaphorical story…I think I shall take her advice and stick to apples this season. A ripe (possibly just slightly bruised) apple of the Peace Corps varietal.
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